Digital Public Record of Scholarly Activities & Review of Orphande

 

---

• Google Scholar
• https://scholar.google.com/citations?user=BML7JBYAAAAJ&hl=en
• Orcid
• https://orcid.org/0000-0003-1362-0295
• IDEAS
• https://ideas.repec.org/e/psh132.html
• ResearchGate
• https://www.researchgate.net/profile/Basu-Sharma

===================

 Review of Orphande: What Loss Teaches Us About Life

Devendra Pratap Shah 

शुक्रबार असार १२, २०८३ | Friday June 26,2026 

-Nepal Touch 

Basu Sharma's Orphande: From Grief to Grit (Star Scholars Press, Baltimore and Philadelphia, 2025) is more than a personal memoir as it navigates the boundaries between autobiography and literary artifice. Through the central figure of Orphande, Sharma offers a profound meditation on resilience, family, migration, and self-discovery that will resonate with Nepalis across generations and across continents. For readers in the global Nepali diaspora, the book offers not only the story of one individual but also a window into the social, cultural, and historical realities that shaped many Nepali lives during the second half of the twentieth century.

At its heart, Orphande is a story born of absence. Losing his mother before the age of four, Orphande grows up carrying a void that shapes much of his emotional and intellectual journey. Yet this is not a tale of victimhood. Rather, it is the story of a determined young boy from the hills of eastern Nepal who, through perseverance, education, and an unwavering sense of purpose, gradually finds his place in the wider world.

The emotional gravity of the book is anchored by his mother, Balkumari. Although Orphande has only faint memories of her and cannot even recall her face, her presence permeates the entire narrative. The narrative begins with her memory and ultimately circles back to her in a moving tribute. Some readers may feel that the final tribute is unnecessary because the entire memoir already serves as a tribute to her life and influence. Yet it is difficult to argue that a mother's impact can ever be overstated. For anyone who has experienced loss, these pages are among the most poignant in the book.

Equally compelling is the author's evolving understanding of his father. One of the book's most memorable moments comes when Orphande reflects on the depth of his father's love. Unlike a mother's affection, which is often immediate and visible, a father's sacrifices frequently reveal themselves only with time and maturity. This theme will resonate strongly with many Nepali readers, particularly those who grew up in households where fathers carried immense responsibilities but rarely expressed their emotions openly. Perhaps the book’s contribution is also its deconstruction of the "traditional" Nepali father.

The memoir offers fascinating glimpses into rural Nepal at a time when life was vastly different from today. Photographs were rare, communication was limited, and family bonds formed the foundation of everyday existence. Readers are reminded how quickly Nepal has changed within a single lifetime. Through rich personal anecdotes, Orphande preserves a world that younger generations know only through stories.

The portrait of Mailee Maiju, Ambikadevi, is especially touching. Her nightly visits to care for his infected eye exemplify the extraordinary devotion that often characterized extended family life in Nepal.

Among the most memorable figures in the book are the women who nurtured and supported Orphande during his childhood. The portrait of Mailee Maiju, Ambikadevi, is especially touching. Her nightly visits to care for his infected eye exemplify the extraordinary devotion that often characterized extended family life in Nepal. Such episodes remind us that a child can be shaped not only by parents but by an entire network of caring relatives.

Beyond being a personal story, it is also a family saga. The lives of Orphande's sisters are among the most heartbreaking and compelling parts of the book. Their stories reveal the hardships, sacrifices, and inequalities that many women endured in traditional Nepali society. Goma's adoption by an uncle and the emotional consequences that followed, the tragedies that befell other family members, and the losses experienced during periods of social upheaval all contribute to a powerful portrait of a family confronting circumstances beyond its control.

The book also touches on broader social realities. Orphande reflects on the disappointment that can come when kindness is met with ingratitude, a lesson many readers will recognize from their own lives. These observations extend beyond individual experiences and encourage reflection on the changing values of society itself. Yet despite moments of betrayal and loss, the memoir remains fundamentally hopeful, emphasizing perseverance, integrity, and compassion.

For members of the Nepali diaspora, another aspect of the book carries particular significance: the journey from rural Nepal to international accomplishment. Many readers will recognize elements of their own lives in the story—from modest beginnings, to education, professional growth, migration, and the challenge of building a life far from home. What distinguishes Orphande is that these experiences are documented with unusual honesty and detail. In preserving his own story, Sharma has preserved a small but meaningful part of Nepal's collective memory.

The author's professional achievements receive relatively modest attention in the memoir. Rather than celebrating accomplishments, he focuses primarily on the personal experiences and relationships that shaped him. This choice reinforces one of the book's central messages: success is meaningful not because of titles, awards, or recognition, but because of the human journey behind it.

The role of his wife, Aniba, also emerges as an important theme. Orphande acknowledges that her companionship transformed his life in profound ways. While he leaves many aspects of that partnership unexplored, his gratitude is evident throughout the narrative, underscoring the importance of family support in navigating life's challenges.

Nepal has not traditionally cultivated a strong culture of memoir writing, yet books like this show why such works matter. They preserve voices, experiences, and perspectives that might otherwise be lost.

Ultimately, Orphande: From Grief to Grit is a meditation on memory, identity, and resilience. It demonstrates how personal history can illuminate broader social history and how one individual's experiences can speak to an entire generation. Nepal has not traditionally cultivated a strong culture of memoir writing, yet books like this show why such works matter. They preserve voices, experiences, and perspectives that might otherwise be lost.

Perhaps the greatest achievement of this memoir is that it encourages readers to reflect on their own stories. Every life contains experiences worth preserving, not because they are extraordinary, but because they are uniquely human. In this sense, Sharma's memoir performs a valuable service. It not only chronicles one remarkable journey but also encourages others to document their own.

A line from the book that lingered in my mind long after I finished reading:

"His father had prepared him for survival; Orphande wanted to prepare his daughter for wonder."

Few sentences capture the spirit of the memoir so beautifully. It reflects a generational transformation—from hardship and survival toward hope, possibility, and aspiration.

One of the book's greatest strengths is its readability. Sharma writes with clarity, warmth, and sincerity. The narrative flows naturally and effortlessly. Even when unfamiliar words appear, the meaning remains accessible, allowing readers to remain fully engaged in the emotional and intellectual journey.

In the end, Orphande: From Grief to Grit is the story of a resilient scholar, devoted family member, and determined human being. Shaped by loss yet guided by perseverance, Sharma's life offers lessons that extend far beyond his own experience. It is a book worthy of a wide readership, particularly among Nepalis both at home and abroad, and one I recommend wholeheartedly.

 

=====================

My Personal Reflection on Basu Sharma’s Memoir

​                                                                       Ram Acharya

 

​

Congratulations to Basu Sharma on Orphande: From Grief to Grit

Dec 1, 2025

https://substack.com

 

My friend Basu Sharma gifted me a copy of his memoir, Orphande: From Grief to Grit, a couple of weeks ago, and I had the chance to go through it recently. I am glad that I did. It is a heartbreaking yet deeply inspiring account of losing his mother at the age of four — the second youngest among six children, then aged one and a half to seventeen. His earliest memory of seeing his mother wrapped in white cloth and carried away by relatives is as haunting as it is tender. He did not understand death, only that something precious had suddenly disappeared.

Growing up in Nepal, he carried the label “Orphande” (Tuhure) — a word that can feel isolating, humiliating, and crushing for a child. Yet somewhere between social rejection, personal confusion, and the harsh realities of rural life, something remarkable happened. Whether it was inner strength inherited from his parents or sheer determination, Basu slowly turned every struggle — big and small, traditional and professional — into a step forward.

The journey he describes is extraordinary. From a remote village in eastern Nepal, he became a store manager, a newspaper editor, president of a student union, a Marxist thinker, and eventually a man determined to pursue higher education in the Western world. He rose high in his career, becoming a very accomplished professor, with three aspiring professional children and a wife who herself is the author of three books.

Losing his mother so young led him to question God and religion, even though his father was deeply devout — a powerful tension that shapes parts of the book.

Orphande is more than a personal story. It is a story of resilience, hard work, dedication, and resolve — whatever it takes to succeed in one’s life and career. It is also a window into the lives of women in Nepal, the burdens carried by children, and the quiet tragedies that shape so many families. It shows how some children, like Basu, manage to rise above unimaginable hardship — while many others never get that chance.

At its heart, the book is a story of loss, transformation, and the strength that grief can unlock. It is a tribute not only to Basu’s parents and siblings, but also to the power of perseverance and hope.

My warmest congratulations to Basu Sharma for writing such a moving and honest memoir — and my sincere gratitude for gifting me the book.